Player Profiles...
 Eager to take his shirt off anywhere it seems but the showers Johnny is the resident club 'keeper. Johnny is also starting to look after himself in the banter stakes these days learning that it's best to give it before anyone gives it to you. Here he is pictured mind whistling at one of the opposition youngsters! | Name; Johnathon "The Rat" "Stephen Hawkins" Baber
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 Andrew 'Pervy' Lewis is Hills Plymouth's Premier all rounder. A balanced diet for Andrew consists of equal amounts of kebab, indian and chinese. Andrew also possesses the best cover drive at the club, with Wisden Cricket Monthly once describing it as 'a lovely juxtaposition of finesse and whamin'. | Name; Andrew Lewis |
 Usually fluctuating between good and can't get it off the square, Chris is nevertheless happy that the clubhouse is right by the pitch. Alhough the 2am walk is something of an eye opener.
| Name: Chris Shopland D.O.B.: 24/12/1981 Previous Clubs: Hirwaun, Aberdare Position: Top order High Score: 118 (v South Llanelli) Best Figures: 2/28 (v Pontyberem) Favourite Film: The Usual Suspects Favourite Book: Escape from the Island of Aquarius Favourite Quote: Cop - What are you saying? Fenster - I said he'll flip you Cop - He'll what? Fenster - Flip you. Flip ya for real. Best Cricket Memory: Winning 80odd v Aberdare as a little nipper Cricket Hero: Steve Waugh Hills Plymouth Hero: Steve 'C3PO' Manning |
 Our man Baber officially has more time off than Pervy's fitness coach, but that's okay cos he's a teacher and he knows what he's on about it. Or does he? In constant battle with his younger sibling (of which 'the rat' is competing well of late) Stephen will have you believe that he is the thinker amongst the team although other members know different.
| Name; Stephen Baber
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 Dai Kelly - where do we start!! David is an aggressive top order bat and skilful spinner who's played for Panteg don't you know. There isn't one player he rates in any of the leagues in South Wales. Or North Wales, or New South Wales, or anywhere actually. He's also a big lumper who enjoys his rugga playing for the local fight club called Dowlais where the pre-match routine is ten cans of Red Bull followed by 100 blue Smarties each. Hyper see. | Name; Dai Kelly
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 Here is the Captain's Dream - Chris Birch - with an expression here that can only be described as... 'questionable'. Bowls expertly and bats sensibly. But this is nothing compared to his groundsman skills where he is seen often pondering the issues of the day with the wedding guests such as liming the square, how many people will sue the club for blood loss caused by the covers and whether or not to get rid of the stingy nettles and brambles that stop his bad balls going for four! | Name; Chris "Beetlejuice" Birch
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 James is one of those that takes everything in his stride. Elegant when in form many say he's the David Gower of the side...although he's right handed and hasn't got grey fluffy hair. He also has a tendency to pick up injuries that haven't been invented yet and it was rumoured that he's suing David Beckham over the use of the metatarsal injury which James is adament he had first back in 2002 against Seven Sisters away. | Name; James "Rocco/Kleb/Knobhead" Kelly
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 'You can't beat a bit of Jerry'. Jerry 'The Bull' Crooker is our Devon player. Everything in Devon is better. The milk is better from the cows udders (pull the udder one), the weather is better, the tracks are better, the standard is better and the women are bigger better. Jeremy is almost certain to start every sentence with 'when I played with (insert any professional here)' and once scored more runs in one season than Graeme Hick has to date.
| Name; Jeremy Crooker
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 Dan is another of Hills' chilled out characters frequently rebelling against 'the man', 'the rules' and any other authority. If I was to say Dan's an expert spinner, that would be selling him short. He also bats too, becoming famous for sweeping anything that pitches full, short, wide, or basically anywhere. He's also wordly famous for appearing in a Bear Grylls Born Survivor documentary killing a stag using just his pecs. | Name; Daniel Davies
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 Every club's got a smart arse....and here he is pictured just above this text. Richard's managed to argue with pretty much everyone so far, a feat which Dai Kelly is tamping over. Potentially very talented, who can bowl very well and can be quite destructive batting. He's the Cristiano Ronaldo of the side, and whilst he doesn't dive on the floor and possess a tango tan he does share other Ronaldo traits. He also had a bigger bruise than the Painting and Jetwash man - FACT! (which was later confirmed by Dave Gibby GP) | Name; Richard Gibby
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 Matty isn't the brightest spark at the club which shows up in his career run outs tally. He's also going to get some flak for the 'cricket club' quote. An inquest is underway! A good bat when he gets going he just needs to knuckle down and stop having lapses of concentration to kick on a level. He's also the goalie for some Merthyr side or something. | Name; Matthew Rhys Lewis
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 Aled 'Michael Buble' Walters is a Hills Plymouth all rounder through and through. Fancies himself as a big hitter lower order batsmen and now is the premier spin bowler in the Second XI, after swinging it like Austin Powers previously with his medium pace. Likes a good old drink too, Aled also plays a bit of rugga in the winters. |
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 One of the clubs sharpest dressers, Nicky Tom's cutting edge ensures he's a hit with lads and ladies alike. His knowledge of (cough) alternate medicines is second to none and he's been a target by Cuban Assassins for the profit warnings they faced lately. You'll find Nicky regulalry in Caesar's Palace aka Coolers/Kirkhouse/Shitehouse or whatever it's called and is always up for a laugh. | Name; Nick Thomson
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 Matthew is as quiet as they come mumbling only from time to time to show signs of life. He is one of Hills' Welsh stars and is aiming to cement his place at this high level. Bowls some genuinely good stuff, as long as he keeps working and not becoming cheeky (like most of Hills' cheeky little kids) he'll be okay for a few years to come. | Name; Matthew ’Sinsir’ Davies
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 Phil Lewis, or Maximus Decimus Lewisus, is the resident second team captain. After refusing to give up his power and then re-instated as captain, Phil takes care of the 'nursery team'....or the second team as others like to call them. His bowling accuracy was once described by Wisden as 'good', Phil will be hoping to lead his troops to the coveted Division Three Trophy this year with speeches like 'What we do in life, echoes in eternity'. | Name; Phil Lewis
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 Dai's philosophy is if it's up there, whack it. Regularly hits the Plymouth houses to the enjoyment of many watchers. David is an avid snwcer player as well and loves his midweek sparring match with every team that plays us (2008 season being the highlight of on-field banter). | Name; David Andrew Fowler
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